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Janice Gill, MSW, RSW, RYT(200)

Janice Gill, MSW, RSW, RYT(200)

Recent Posts

A letter to my 20 year-old self… February 24, 2019
On bed-making: Lessons from the Swiss October 23, 2018
On Feeling Your Feelings October 22, 2018
Feel Your Feelings October 22, 2018
On making conscious choices: What do you mean you don’t eat avocados? October 21, 2018

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When we choose fulfillment over achievement, we can experience a deep, grounded sense of joy and satisfaction from within, as opposed to the externally motivated, false and fleeting sense of joy that is dependent upon outside factors (and, often, outside praise and approval). ✨ How do YOU know if you are prioritizing fulfillment over achievement?

Shame is a different kind of inheritance—it’s an inheritance of inherent unworthiness. Inherent badness. Inherent not-good-enoughness. If you feel not good enough, chances are your parents felt not good enough, and your parents’ parents felt not good enough, as well as your parents’ parents’ parents, and so on. Basically, our parents’ internalized shame becomes our own internalized shame over time because with each, small, perceived transgression, outside of their conditioned conceptions of what makes a child “good” and therefore, a parent, “good,” over time, our sense of self becomes increasingly constricted. The end result is a self that is conditioned to think/feel/behave in ways that protect the parents’ sense of worthiness at the cost of the child’s (and one day, adult’s) own freedom, spontaneous, authentic, expression, and self-governed autonomy. Research has found Shame to be the most powerful and painful affective state (which for many becomes a long-term trait)...So, incase you’ve been looking for it, here is your permission: It’s okay for you to let go of that which no longer serves you. Whether it’s unsightly China patterns or an unrelenting sense of Shame; if you didn’t ask for it, and it’s doing nothing to serve you, do the work to Let. It. Go. 🎈

Miracles are occurring every day to keep us on our path. We are always on our path. It doesn’t mean we can’t change our direction... it means we can! We always can and, regardless of the outcome, there we are, on our path! ✨ 👣 💕

There is so much more in store for you than fulfilling your parents’ hopes, dreams, and expectations. There was a time, yes, when you desperately sought and needed their praise and approval, in attempt to receive the love and care every young person requires...somewhere along the lines, you learned that love was conditional. It should never have been that way. It’s not that way. You have some great miracles waiting for you that require only your approval! Be open to the process and seize opportunities that bring you joy and align with YOUR values, hopes, dreams, and priorities. This is your life. You have the power to make it a good one.✨

It’s not your job, it was never your job to suppress and sacrifice your own inner experiences in order to ensure another’s comfort. We assume these roles as an early-on survival strategy to ensure our caregivers are “okay,” ultimately, so our own most basic needs can be met by the people we are supposed to be dependent on. But it’s not our job. It was never our job. There was a disruption in the equation, and somewhere along the way, we got the message that others’ pain, suffering, discomfort were our responsibility. Maybe even “our fault?” Herein lie the roots of codependency. It’s a deeply ingrained pattern to unlearn. A helpful starting point is to practice self-observation—checking in with yourself, moment to moment, and asking, “What do I feel and what do I need right now?” It’s your turn. Time to show your self the same care and concern you showed and show for others. 💕

Life is funny. One day, you’re a uni student with such high anxiety that you drop a course upon first sight of a required presentation on the syllabus, and one day, you’re a professor, standing up at the front of the class, sharing this story, using your experience to connect with students experiencing similar feelings, while creating an atmosphere of safety, trust, and respect, so they can safely hone this important professional skill that so many dread and will never face. Experiencing safety in being seen, knowing that their “evaluator” has the utmost empathy and compassion, and that their colleagues are all in the same boat...if onnnlllyyy I knew then what I know now. Everyone was in my boat. Everyone was on my side. We were all in it together. We are all in this thing together. I know that for sure now. I have never so intensely had the feeling that I am right.where.i.need.to.be. And, it feels so good. 🙏🏼💕✨ 📸@lomillerphoto

Location & Contact Info

Inside Health Clinic
2486 Old Bronte Road Suite 107

Clinic Phone: (905) 842-6654

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