On making conscious choices: What do you mean you don’t eat avocados?
We should never need to explain or feel guilty about making conscious choices for our health and/or mental health. People who truly love and care about us will support us and our choices—not question, taunt, or try to sabotage those choices. Sometimes, it feels hard, when people know us in one way—they come to expect certain behaviours from us—and when we begin to behave differently because we are making conscious choices that align with our values and nurture our mind, body and/or spirit, it can bring up some discomfort. But that discomfort is not about us. It is about others having a hard time embracing change. Accepting what’s different. And, sometimes, it’s about illuminating the choices that others would prefer to be making in their own lives but are stuck in old habitual ways of being or behaving.
If you are being mindful of your money, and are consciously choosing where you spend it, you may not attend that brunch you used to attend regularly and that’s okay. If you are conserving your energy, and you are slightly more selective about the social engagements you say yes to, that’s okay. If you are being mindful of your alcohol consumption or other substance use or are steering clear of substances altogether, that’s okay. If you are going to bed earlier, that’s okay. If you need to pray before you eat, meditate before you leave, or practice noble silence in the morning, that’s okay. If you’ve taken a break from or deactivated your social media, that’s okay. If you have chosen to put boundaries up with people, that’s okay. If you no longer eat meat, dairy, sugar, wheat, gluten, avocados or all of the above, that’s okay. Accept for the avocados. What is the matter with you? Who doesn’t eat avocados? Kidding! But see? That’s how it goes. It’s those little snap judgments that are neither necessary nor helpful, and they are certainly not supportive.
You are not a wet blanket. You can still have fun without eating avocados. You still are who you are at your core, and choosing not to eat avocados should not impact anyone else around you. Your not eating avocados should in no way impact their ability to have fun and enjoy themselves. But when it does—and sometimes, it does—and your conscious choice that you work hard every day to make becomes sacrificed, it might be time to start thinking about finding some other people to surround yourself with—perhaps, others who are also making the conscious choice in their lives to not eat avocados.
Just as it is not okay for others to judge you for the choices you are making, it is also not okay for you to judge others for the choices they are making. We are all on our paths, doing our best, seeking to live our best life, and whether that life is with or without avocados, we are all still worthy of love and belonging.